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Exploring your family financial heritage

Discover Your Family Money Story: Why Digging into Your Financial Heritage Matters

· 3 min read · Money Mindset

You can tell the story about Grandpa deciding to run his first marathon at age 60, and how Aunt Jenny was the first one in your family to go to college. But can you recount your family’s money story? Our family money story is the “original software” behind the attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors we bring to our financial life. Understanding this story can unlock profound insights into our financial behaviors and help us create a more abundant future.

Why Your Family Money Story is Important

For some of us, our family money story is all too familiar. For others, it percolates under the surface, influencing our choices without our conscious awareness. Before we can change this story, we have to get clear on what it is. Understanding your financial heritage helps you identify patterns that might be holding you back.

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The Four Parts of Your Family Money Story

  1. Events: What you experienced with money.
  2. Messages: What people said about it.
  3. Feelings: The emotional tone, even when nothing was said.
  4. Meaning: How we interpret the events, messages, and feelings.

A great way to dive into your family money story is by sketching out a Financial Genogram. It’s like a family tree that shows how money impacted your family members. This tool can be eye-opening, helping you see the financial patterns and attitudes that have shaped your life.

Understanding and Changing Your Story

Reflecting on your family’s financial past can bring up a lot of emotions. It’s important to approach this with empathy and without blame. Remember, your family members were responding to their own events, messages, feelings, and meanings. Their experiences were shaped by their circumstances and the knowledge they had at the time.

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A Personal Anecdote

One woman I worked with found herself irked when her son ordered the most expensive item on the menu. She realized this reaction was rooted in her family’s scarcity mindset, even though they could afford it. By reflecting on this, she had a meaningful conversation with her son about gratitude and the value of money. She shared her own struggles with money and how she overcame them, which helped her son understand her perspective better.

Moving Forward with a New Perspective

We are all part of a developing narrative. None of us holds the full truth about how money works or what one should do with it. Keep your family money story in perspective, and try to write the best chapter for you. Embrace the positive aspects of your financial heritage and work on transforming the negative ones.

Practical Steps to change your Money Story

  1. Identify Patterns: Look for recurring themes and attitudes in your family’s financial history.
  2. Acknowledge Emotions: Understand the feelings associated with these patterns without judgment.
  3. Create New Beliefs: Replace limiting beliefs with empowering ones.
  4. Educate Yourself: Increase your financial literacy to make informed decisions.
  5. Communicate: Talk openly with family members about money to break the cycle of silence.

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Engaging with Your Financial Heritage

Engaging with your financial heritage is not just about identifying problems; it’s also about celebrating strengths and learning from past successes. For instance, if your family has a history of entrepreneurial spirit, you can draw inspiration from that. Understanding both the positive and negative aspects of your financial heritage can help you build a balanced and healthy relationship with money.

Take Action: Understand Your Money Archetype

Ready to uncover the secrets of your financial personality? Take our Money Quiz today and gain valuable insights into your relationship with money. Understanding your Money Archetype can support you to make smarter financial decisions and manage your financial path with confidence. Click here to take the quiz and start shifting your financial future now

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Ready to change your Money Story?

Discover your money archetype with our free 5-minute assessment, or book a discovery call with Ilana to explore what transformation looks like for you.

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Continue your path

Explore more resources to deepen your understanding of your relationship with money:

The Complete Money Mindset Guide →
Understanding Money Trauma →

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Ilana Jankowitz  ·  Certified Money Coach (CMC)  ·  NLP Practitioner  ·  Inside-Out Money Coach (10+ Years)  ·  Featured Speaker at Google & IAPC